Chuck Norris can watch an episode of 60 Minutes in a half-hour.
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I think Chuck Norris is fake cuz if he were real he'd come right now and smash my face into my keyboaraoebdbfjvjdblgoirugsvdkf
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Two things in life are certain: Death and a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris.
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Spider-man can crawl on walls and ceilings, Chuck Norris can crawl on water.
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Everybody loves Raymond. Except for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris ate a sheet of paper, then later found an origami swan in the toilet.
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There's an order to the universe: space, time, Chuck Norris...
Just kidding, Chuck Norris is first.
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Chuck Norris walks up his staircase to get to the basement.
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Chuck never auditioned for Walker Texas Ranger, a camera crew turned up at his house and secretly filmed him.
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Once while having s*x in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris' sperm escaped and ran into the engine.
We now know this truck....as Optimus Prime.
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Chuck Norris doesn't prepare dinner; dinner knows when to be ready.
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