Q:Why don't giraffes like fast food? A:Because they can't catch it!
How many skunks do you need to make a house really smelly? Just a phew.
What do a rattlesnake and a soft penis have in common? You can't f**k with either one.
How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight? Have YOU ever seen a rabbit with glasses?
Why are cows made for dancing? They re all born hoofers.
Little Johnny's teacher said, "Johnny, your essay on My Dog is exactly the same as your sister's." Did you copy hers?, she asked. Johnny replied, "No, teacher, it's the same dog!"
Q: What's invisible and smells like carrots? A: Bunny farts!
A mother and baby camel are talking one day when the baby camel asks, "Mom why have I got these huge three-toed feet?" The mother replies, "Well son, when we trek across the desert your toes will help you to stay on top of the soft sand." "Okay," said the son. A few minutes later the son asks, "Mom, why have I got these great long eyelashes?" "They are there to keep the sand out of your eyes on the trips through the desert," "Thanks Mom," replies the son. After a short while, the son returns and asks, "Mom, why have I got these great big humps on my back?" The mother, now a little impatient with the boy replies, "They are there to help us store fat for our long treks across the desert, so we can go without water for long periods." "That's great mom, so we have huge feet to stop us sinking, and long eyelashes to keep the sand from our eyes and these humps to store water, but Mom ..." "Yes son?" "What good does all that do us here in the San Diego Zoo?"
Why do black widow spiders kill their males after mating? To stop the snoring before it starts.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a boy scout? A boyscout who helps little old ladies hop across the street.
A lady goes into a bar with her goose. Then the bartender comes up to her and says, "Why did you have to bring the pig in with you?" Then the lady answered, "Excuse me, I think this is a goose." And the bartender says, "Excuse me, I was talking to the goose."