# Joke #5455

I love math - it makes people cry.
Vote: has 58.35 % from 58 votes. Send joke:

## Similar jokes

A blonde desserts her home town out of shame, and colors her hair brown. She drives past a farm and sees all the sheep. She goes up to the farmer and ask, "If I guess how many sheep you have can I have one?" The farmer nodded. She continued. "159" The farmer is surprised. "How did you know?" "Lucky guess" She grabs one and gets in her car. The farmer comes up and says, "If I can guess your real hair color can I get my dog back?"
Vote: has 69.88 % from 47 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, animal, money, math, dog
A chemist, a physicist, and a mathematician are stranded on an island when a can of food rolls ashore. The chemist and the physicist comes up with many ingenious ways to open the can. Then suddenly the mathematician gets a bright idea: "Assume we have a can opener..."
Vote: has 69.14 % from 110 votes. Send joke:

Chuck Norris knows the last number of infinity.
Vote: has 52.18 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math
...and then the devil said, "Let's put the alphabet into mathematics."
Vote: has 62.75 % from 93 votes. Send joke:

Teacher: Why does the statue of liberty stand in New York harbour? Pupil: Because it can’t sit down! An ideal homework excuse Teacher: Where is your homework? Pupil: I lost it fighting this kid who said you weren’t the best teacher in the school Teacher: If 1+1=2 and 2+2=4, what is 4+4? Pupil: That’s not fair! You answer the easy ones and leave us with the hard one!
Vote: has 64.28 % from 25 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school, math, teacher
A helium molecule walks in afterwards. The bellhop asks if he needs any help. Helium doesn't react.
Vote: has 48.69 % from 37 votes. Send joke:

A mathematician and an engineer agreed to take part in an experiment. They were both placed in a room and at the other end was a beautiful naked woman on a bed. The experimenter said every 30 seconds they would be allowed to travel half the distance between themselves and the woman. The mathematician said "this is pointless" and stormed off. The engineer agreed to go ahead with the experiment anyway. The mathematician exclaimed on his way out "don't you see, you'll never actually reach her?". To which the engineer replied, "so what? Pretty soon I'll be close enough for all practical purposes!"
Vote: has 70.36 % from 76 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math, women, science, time
Little Johnny was heard by his mother reciting his homework: "Two plus two, the son of a bitch is four; four plus four, the son of a bitch is eight; eight plus eight, the son of a bitch!" Johnny shouted his mother "Watch your language! You're not allowed to use the swearwords." But, Mom, replied the boy, "That's what the teacher taught us, and she said to recite it out loud till we learned it." Next day Johnny's mother went right into the classroom to complain. "Oh, heavens" said the teacher. "That's not what I taught them. They're supposed to say, 'Two plus two, the sum of which is four."
Vote: has 74.29 % from 70 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: little Johnny, vulgar, math, teacher