Chuck Norris Turns his grass emo so it will cut itself.
Salmon swim upstream because Chuck Norris is downstream.
Chuck Norris once planted a box of Cheerios in his yard, the result was a donut tree.
Chuck Norris was once hospitalised, becaused he kicked his own ass.
Chuck Norris can pop every kernel in the bag without burning one.
Chuck Norris can infect a mac with pc viruses.
Kryptonite is ancient Latin for Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris once rolled a dice. It landed on tails.
Thomas Edson made a shadow on a paper that Chuck Norris was reading, then Thomas Edson decided to create the electric light.
Chuck Norris doesn't get sun burnt; that would be a foolish thing for the sun to do.
Chuck Norris turns his game off while saving.