What is the geographical definition of s*x?
Ans: It is an action done by the polland in the holland between the thailand with the little help of greece.
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Q: Why is the camel called the ship of the desert?
A: Because it's full of Arab semen.
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My girlfriend came out of the shower and said, "I shaved my pussy you know what that means?"
I said, "Yeah the fucking drain is clogged again."
Q: What is the difference between a mouse and a dick?
A: No difference. Both are searching a hole.
Q: What's the difference between a genealogist and a gynecologist?
A: The genealogist checks the family tree and the gynecologist checks the family bush.
Why do people say 'Grow some balls?'
Balls are weak and sensitive.
If you wanna be tough, grow a vagina.
Those things can take a pounding.
Q: What do you get when you cross a elephant with a witch?
A: I don’t know but she will need a very large broom!
A man went to the doctor’s office to get a double dose of Viagra.
The doctor told him that he couldn’t allow him a double dose.
“Why not?” asked the man.
“Because it’s not safe,” replied the doctor.
“But I need it really bad,” said the man.
“Well, why do you need it so badly?” asked the doctor.
The man said, “My girlfriend is coming into town on Friday; my ex-wife will be here on Saturday; and my wife is coming home on Sunday. Can’t you see? I must have a double dose.”
The doctor finally relented saying, “Okay, I’ll give it to you, but you have to come in on Monday morning so that I can check you to see if there are any side effects.”
On Monday, the man dragged himself in; his arm in a sling.
The doctor asked, “What happened to you?”
The man said, “No one showed up.”
Two eggs boiling in a pan.
One says, "I've got a huge crack."
The other replies, "Stop teasing me, I'm not f*cking hard yet."
How can you tell a tough lesbian bar?
Even the pool table has no balls.
A couple was having an argument, and the man was losing badly.
After 5 minutes the woman won the argument proving the man to be stupid, the man sadly says
"If my proof falls then I rome through the halls."
Then the woman leaves for 10 minutes and comes back starts giving him a blowjob.
The man is confused and says "what are you doing?"
She said "If I prove you dumb I give ya some."
The man continues to lose a argument knowing he will get a blowjob after 10 minutes, and he did.
Years later they have a kid but none of them want him so they have an argument of who takes care of it and the other leaves for good.
The man without a thought loses the argument the get another blowjob, but after the argument the woman starts rapping
"Yo yo guess who's the kid, not me so suck yourself bitch."
Before she leaves the he says "what about the blowjob?"
She says ask my twin sister that has herpes cause she did it the whole time.