A guy goes to a house of prostitution. He selects a girl, pays her $200 up front, and he gets undressed. She's about to take off her sheer blue negligee, when the fire alarms rings! She runs out of the room, with his $200 still in her hand. He quickly grabs his clothes and runs out after her. He's searching the building, but the smoke gets too heavy, so he runs outside looking for her. By this time, the firemen are there. He sees one of them and asks, "Did you see a beautiful blonde, in a sheer blue negligee, with $200 in her hand?" The fireman says, "No!" The guy then says, "Well if you see her, screw her. It's paid for."
How can you tell if a blonde sends you a fax? It has a stamp on it.
How does a blonde turn on the light after sex? She opens the car door.
Q: How are blondes like postage stamps? A: You lick'm, stick'em, and send'em on their way.
Q: How do you make a blonde's brain the size of a pea? A: Inflate it.
Why does a blonde put perfume on her ankles? Because it ends up behind her ears anyway!
Q. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman? A. Cause you have to hollow out it's head!
Q: What do you call a blonde in the freezer? A: Her parents named her Cindy so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
John and Bob were inseparable childhood friends. One night, they both died in a terrible car accident. When John woke up in heaven, he began to search for Bob but could not find him anywhere. Very distraught, he ran to St. Peter and said, "St. Peter, I know Bob was killed in that accident with me, but I can’t find him!" St. Peter said, "My son, I am sorry to tell you Bob didn’t make it to Heaven." This upset John so much that St. Peter agreed to let him see Bob one more time. St. Peter parted the clouds and John saw Bob sitting in hell with a keg on one side and a beautiful buxom blonde on the other. John looked at St. Peter skeptically and said, "Are you sure I’m in the right place?" "My son," St. Peter said, "looks can be deceiving. You see that keg of beer? It has a hole in it. You see that woman? She doesn’t!"
How do you make a blonde laugh on Monday morning? Tell her a joke on Friday night.
What’s blonde, brunette, blonde, brunette…? A blonde doing cartwheels.