What's the difference between John Wayne and Jack Daniels? Jack Daniels is still killing Indians.
Why is making toast like an interracial couple having a baby? It's annoying when it comes out black.
What do Gary Glitter and Napalm have in common? Both can strip the clothes off a small Vietnamese child in under two seconds.
Q: What do you call an African-American whose spouse just died? A: A black widow.
What do you get when you cross a brassiere with Texas? Playtex.
Why do pill bottles have cotton buds in the top of them? To remind niggers that they were cotton pickers before they were drug dealers.
In the winter of 1926, Thelma Goldstein from Chicago treated herself to her first real vacation in Florida. Being unfamiliar with the area, she wandered into a restricted hotel in North Miami. "Excuse me," she said to the manager. "My name is Mrs. Goldstein, and I’d like a small room for two weeks." "I’m awfully sorry," he replied, "but all of our rooms are occupied." Just as he said that, a man came down and checked out. "What luck," said Mrs. Goldstein. "Now there’s a room. "Not so fast, Madam. I’m sorry, but this hotel is restricted. No Jews allowed." "Jewish? Who’s Jewish? I happen to be Catholic." "I find that hard to believe. Let me ask you, who was the Son of God?" "Jesus, Son of Mary." "Where was he born?" "In a stable." "And why was he born in a stable?" "Because a schmuck like you wouldn’t let a Jew rent a room in his hotel!"
A young Jewish Mom walks her son to the school bus corner on his first day of kindergarten. "Behave, my bubaleh," she says. "Take good care of yourself and think about your Mother, tataleh!" "And come right back home on the bus, schein kindaleh." "Your Mommy loves you a lot, my ketsaleh!" At the end of the school day the bus comes back and she runs to her son and hugs him. "So what did my pupaleh learn on his first day of school?" The boy answers, "I learned my name is David."
Me: Staring contest. Go! Me: O.O Friend: -.- Me: I win! You blinked! Haha Friend: You bastard, I'm asian!
Q: How do you piss off a white person? A: Call him a racist.
How does a girl from Harlem practice safe sex? She locks the car doors.