Joke #5890

Chuck Noris can make grapes from wine.
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has 42.19 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, wine

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In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.
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A drunk sitting at a bar observes a very snobby woman participating in a wine tasting contest. She was very good at identifying the wine. At the first taste she says: "Cabernet Sauvignon, 1998" and all the people were amazed. At the 2nd try she answers "Cabernet Sauvignon, 1953" and they were once again amazed. Then the drunk pisses in a glass and hands it to her. She tries it and says "Yak, this tastes like piss!" And the drunk says, "Yeah, but what year was I born?"
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Chuck Norris takes a meteor shower.
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Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
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Chuck Norris won the gold, silver and bronze medals at the Olympics. In the same event. From home.
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At Christmas time, there's nothing I love more than sitting in front of a warm fire, mulled wine in hand, and singing Christmas songs until I slowly fall asleep. Maybe that's why I'm no longer a fireman.
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The secret of enjoying a good bottle of wine: 1. Open the bottle to allow it to breathe. 2. If it doesn't look like it's breathing, give it mouth-to-mouth.
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I told my wife that a man is like a fine wine... I always get better with age. The next day, she locked me in the wine cellar.
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Chuck Norris went an hour without killing... just to kill some time.
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