When Chuck Norris falls into a puddle of water he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris.
This is just a joke, we know Chuck Norris doesn't fall..ever
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Chuck Norris uses battery acid for eye drops.
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When Chuck Norris got stung by a bee, the Bee had an allergic reaction called Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't just bring home the bacon, he brings home the whole pig.
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Chuck Norris doesn't sweat.
He forces the air around him to cry and uses it's tears to cool himself.
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Chuck Norris watches Saturday Night Live on Friday.
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Chuck Norris actually completed Tetris.
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Chuck Norris' favorite game is winning.
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Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards.
Chuck Norris can throw Brett Favre even further.
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Chuck Norris is the only weapon allowed through airport security
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When Chuck Norris says "Jump", you don't say, "How high?" - you say, "When do I come down?"
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