Chuck Norris can speak Spanish in three different languages.
Chuck Norris puts the fun in funeral.
When Chuck Norris was a kid his parents took him to a beach in Georgia. While swimming Chuck Norris pants came down and out popped Florida.
Chuck Norris doesn't die...he just sleep in the ground for a little bit.
Chuck Norris can cash two party, out of state checks with no ID, or else!
The wind is Chuck Norris breathing.
Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.
Chuck Norris CAN leave Hotel California.
Aliens DO indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.
When Chuck goes into outer space his head doesn't pop, space pops around his head!
Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car he walks.