Chuck Norris inhales carbon monoxide and exhales oxygen.
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Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother’s womb.
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When Chuck Norris was in kindergarden he made his teacher spit out her gum.
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When you google up Chuck Norris, he googles you back for revenge.
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When Chuck Norris was kidnapped by aliens he did experiments on them.
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Chuck Norris beat the light speed by 2 hours and 23 minutes.
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Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass.
At night.
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Chuck Norris made a mistake once and it corrected itself.
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Chuck Norris is not impressed with your facts...
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Chuck Norris put humpty dumpty back together again, only to roundhouse kick him in the face.
Later Chuck dined on scrambled eggs with all the king's horses and all the king's men.
The king himself could not attend for unspecified reasons.
Coincidentally, the autopsoy revealed the cause of death to be a roundhouse kick to the face.
There is only one King.
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Before they met Chuck Norris, the Black Eyed Peas were simply known as "The Peas."
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