Suicide committed Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't wear a wristwatch. He always knows when it's time to kick some ass.
Chuck Norris DNA is classified.
Chuck Norris invented 1080p so people could see his beard is made of razor wire.
Chuck Norris does not need deodorant because sweat instantly runs away.
Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother’s womb.
It takes a master to shoot a fly from a hundred Paces, but it takes a Chuck Norris to roundhouse-kick one from a thousand.
Chuck Norris has never used a question mark in his life.
Chuck Norris can count the number of corners in a circle.
The Mayans predict that Chuck Norris going to roundhouse kick this earth in the year 2012.
Obama's health care plan won't cover injuries caused by a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to the face. Nobody would survive anyway.