Chuck Norris stared at the sun... the sun went blind.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a GPS. Chuck Norris decides where he is.
The goal of life is living in agreement with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he dares his grass to grow.
Chuck Norris cannot only accelerate beyond the speed of light. He can also accelerate beyond the speed of dark.
When Chuck Norris was born he drove his mom home from the hospital.
Chuck Norris is widely predicted to be first black president. If you’re thinking to yourself, “But Chuck Norris isn’t black”, then you are dead wrong. And stop being a racist.
Chuck Norris once gave a box of his old watches to a group of kids. These kids are now known as the power rangers.
Chuck Norris killed the devil and is selling his own line of Picks of Destiny, available in all Chuck Norris approved guitar shops.
Chuck Norris can kill with blank bullets.
Death once took Chuck Norris. He regreted it.