The Earth was flat until Chuck Norris looked in it's direction...then it rolled up into a ball.
Ghosts actually have their own kind of tv. The show that scares them the most is called "Chuck Norris Caught On Tape".
Chuck Norris was an only child. Eventually.
Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.
Chuck Norris can unlock a hairpin with a door.
Santa Claus asks Chuck Norris for presents.
Chuck Norris stopped playing golf after that unfortunate incident with the dinosaurs.
The Tower of Pisa was in Chuck Norris' way.
A Chuck Norris round house kick is considered the first "super-collider".
What happens when Chuck Norris orders a beer and gets a beer? He roundhouses the waitress, Chuck Norris should not have to ask.
He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. He who lives by Chuck Norris, dies by the roundhouse kick.