They wanted to put Chuck Norris's face on Mount Rushmore, but the granite wasn't hard enough for his beard.
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The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
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Chuck Norris has a black belt in every language.
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Chuck Norris to Major Tom - Stay there.
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Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant.
The steak did what it was told.
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Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.
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Chuck Norris can take the bridge to nowhere and actually reach his destination.
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The actual definition of U.F.O is Chuck Norris's Toy Frisbee.
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Scientists called it a big bang, Chuck Norris called it an alarm clock.
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Sharks watch Chuck Norris week.
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Chuck Norris's wish isn't your command, Chuck Norris's command is your wish...
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