Chuck Norris does not need to freeze water to make ice, he just stares at water and scares it stiff.
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Chuck Norris does not eat.
Food understands that the only safe haven from Chuck Norris' fists is inside his own body.
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When Chuck crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways.
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Chuck Norris Doesn't breakdance.
He breaks dance
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Chuck Norris once made an omelette from a Fabergé egg.
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Chuck Norris doesn't travel at the speed of light, light travels at the speed of Chuck Norris!
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Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
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Chuck Norris once toboggoned down Mount Everest and then sprinted back up cuz he realized he lost his mitten.
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Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."
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If there's something strange...
In your neighborhood... Who ya gonna call?...
CHUCK NORRIS!
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Chuck Norris doesn't need to wear steel toes, his toes already are.
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