Joke #7110

"Mommy, Mommy! Where have all your scabs gone?" "Shut up and eat your corn flakes."
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: disgusting

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Three men were trekking through the desert and came across a magician standing at the top of a slide. The magician said, "You may each go down the slide and ask for a drink. When you reach the bottom of the slide, you shall land in a huge glass of that drink. The first man went down yelling, "Beer!" He landed in a glass of beer. The second man went down yelling, "Lemonade!" He landed in a glass of lemonade. The third guy man down the slide yelling, "Wee!"
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has 70.32 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: beer, disgusting
Q: What has two legs and bleeds? A: Half a cat.
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has 45.78 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: cat, disgusting
Take a squirt gun into the rest room stall next to someone and shoot little drops over the wall every couple of seconds while pretending to pee.
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has 60.85 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: April fools, disgusting
There was an old couple who hadn't celebrated Halloween in a long time, so they decided to dress up and go out. The old woman went in her bedroom, stripped naked, and tied a string between her legs with a lemon at the end of the string. When she walked out of the room her husband yelled, "You can't go out like that!" "I can go out as whatever I want and so can you!" The man agreed and went into his room. Soon he came out naked with a string tied to his penis and a potato at the end of the string. The woman said, "You're going out as that?" "Yes," said the old man. "If you can go out as a sourpuss, I can go out as a dicktator."
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has 71.74 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: couple, disgusting, Halloween, old people
Q: Why did the gay man get fired from his job at the sperm bank? A: Drinking on the job.
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has 70.05 % from 250 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, gay, work
What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator? When you take sausage out of the fridge it doesn't fart.
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has 49.51 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Three drifters are roaming the countryside for some time. They come upon a small farmhouse with crops planted around it. They are very hungry, thirsty, and tired so the first guy suggests they steal some food. The second says they should ask for food, so he then goes up and knocks on the door and an old, ugly lady answers. He asks for food and she agrees - but only under one condition. They must have sex with her. The first drifter says no, the lady is too ugly, and goes back into the woods. The third guy is very hungry and agrees. He enters the cottage and goes into a corner near a pile of corn to transact his business with the old lady. The old lady is ready, but the guy says he'll only do it if she's blindfolded. So she puts on a blindfold and bends over. Quickly the guy grabs an ear of corn and sticks it inside the old lady, then throws it out the window. The woman says, "Again," and the man does the same thing. Satisfied, she gives the man some food and he leaves. As he is walking out of the farmhouse, he comes upon the other two guys. "Guess what?" the first guy says, "while you screwed that old hag we found two ears of cream corn!"
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has 67.34 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
How did the live baby escape from a room filled with with zombie babies? He ate his way out.
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has 20.26 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: baby, disgusting
Two hunters are stalking through the forest when one says to the other that he has to take a dump. "Well, go in the bushes." "What should I use to wipe my ass?" "Use a dollar bill." A few minutes later the hunter steps out of the bushes with s**t all over his hands. "What happened?" asks his friend. "I didn't have a dollar bill, so I used four quarters."
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has 44.46 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, hunting, money
Q: Did you hear about the redneck who was shooting craps? A: He blew a hole in the toilet.
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has 55.37 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, redneck