Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chuck Norris' glare will liquify your kidney.
Chuck Norris can kill you as many times as he wants to. He knows CPR.
Chuck Norris can blow up things, without a bomb.
Chuck Norris can smoke underwater.
Some people break the laws of the state, Chuck Norris breaks the laws of physics.
Lawsuit commercials for personal injury are quite common with things like accidents and medication; however they never mention Chuck Norris.
Wanna know how Chuck Norris grew his beard? He didn't, his beard grew him.
Harry Potter needs 8 movies to seek and destroy Voldemort. Chuck Norris needs 4 seconds.
When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.
Did you ever wonder how the moon got craters? 3 words: Chuck Norris Golf.
Chuck Norris can make music in Adobe Photoshop.