Chuck Norris was supposed to be in the movie Halloween but the director thought it would be kind of stupid for Michael Meyers to stab himself in fear.
When Chuck Norris says 'Candyman' five times in a row, no one appears. Candyman ain't stupid.
Chuck Norris never has a deja vu. No scene would be that stupid to appear in front of the man twice.
Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice and Chuck Norris will roundhouse kick me for being stupid.
On Halloween, children give Chuck Norris candy.
Chuck Norris doesn't need his seatbelt becouse no one is stupid enough to hit him.
Darth Vader wears a Chuck Norris mask for Halloween.
A kid once tried to scare Chuck Norris on Halloween... sadly he has had the hiccups now for 40 years.
Count Dracula once bit Chuck Norris and immediately turned vegetarian.
Q: Why aren't there more famous skeletons? A: They're a bunch of no bodies!
Q: How do you know your doctor is a vampire? A: He draws your blood from your neck with a straw!