Q: Did you hear about the depressed proctologist?
A: He's been feeling down in the dumps.
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Jeremy and Kris walk down the street and see a dog licking himself.
Jeremy says, "Man, I wish I could do that!"
Kris replies, "I think you'd have to pet him first."
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What is grosser than gross?
When you're kissing Grandma and she slips you the tongue.
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"Mommy, Mommy! Where have all your scabs gone?"
"Shut up and eat your corn flakes."
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What's green and smells like pork?
Kermit's finger.
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The fingers of my girlfriend were in my pants;
I asked her "Is it thick?"
She said "yes dear."
Again I asked: "Is it warm?"
She replied: "yes honey."
Then I asked: "Is it soft?"
She said, "yes of course."
"It is my shit!" I told her.
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Joke has 53.73 % from 170 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, disgusting, relationship, sex
Q: Why did the cowboy have sh*t in his mustache?
A: Cuz he'd been lookin for love in all the wrong places.
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What do you call an incestuous nephew?
An aunt-eater.
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What is more disgusting than a pile of 100 dead babies?
One live one in the middle is eating its way out.
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An old man and his wife went to the doctor's office.
The doctor asked the man for a blood, urine and feces sample.
The man was slightly deaf and said, "What?"
The doctor said, "I need a blood, urine and feces sample."
The man still looked puzzled, so his wife leaned over and yelled into his ear, "Sheldon, the doctor needs a pair of your underwear."
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Two flies sit on a pile of poop.
One fly passes gas.
The other fly looks at him and says, "Hey do you mind? I'm eating here."
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