Chuck Norris never needs help, help needs Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris got a perfect SAT score by just putting his name on the paper...
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Chuck Norris likes his steaks still mooing.
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Chuck Norris doesn't play computer games,the computer plays Chuck Norris games.
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Chuck Norris’ PC doesn’t have a Recycle bin – because when Chuck Norris deletes something, there’s no chance of it coming back.
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Lays chips claims "No one can eat just one".
Wrong.
Chuck Norris ate ONE, laughed then ate a whole bag of Doritos.
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If you carefully examine your health insurance policy, you will see that there is no cover for "Chuck Norris related incidents".
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Chuck Norris acting contracts are if the movie producer want Chuck Norris to act in his movie, the producer is roundhouse kicked.
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Chuck Norris cut's a knife with butter.
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Chuck Norris can get a strike in bowling using a ping-pong ball.
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Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar.
The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
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