Dinosaurs once crossed Chuck Norris. Once.
A meteor did not kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just went on a hunting trip.
Q: What do you get when you cross a dinosaur with Chuck Norris? A: Nothing. Nobody crosses Chuck Norris.
Scientists believe that a giant meteor killed off the dinosaurs. This is true, if you can consider Chuck Norris to be a giant meteor.
Meteors didn't kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just needed a new pair of boots.
Chuck Norris stopped playing golf after that unfortunate incident with the dinosaurs.
Count Dracula once bit Chuck Norris and immediately turned vegetarian.
A group of children once said, "Red rover, red rover, send Chuck Norris over." Those children were the dinosaurs.
Mama Raptor and Papa Raptor were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Raptor a choice of which parent to live with. JUDGE: "Do you want to live with your mother?" BABY RAPTOR: "No! She beats me." JUDGE: "OK, then you can live with your father." BABY RAPTOR: "No! He beats me too!" JUDGE: "Well you have to live with someone. Who do you want to live with?" BABY RAPTOR: "I want to live with my Aunt Bertha in Toronto." JUDGE: "Is there any chance she'll beat you also?" BABY RAPTOR: "No sir. The Toronto Raptors don't beat anybody."
In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.
Chuk Norris was only twice angry, and those times are known as WWI and WWII.