Nobody has ever told Chuck Norris a yo-mama joke and lived to tell about it.
Count Dracula once bit Chuck Norris and immediately turned vegetarian.
Yo mamma so ugly she scares Chuck Norris!
Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
Leonardo DiCaprio had to ask permission from Chuck Norris to say the famous line "I'm the king of the world."
A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
Yo momma's so fat; she's in two time zones at the same time!
Chuck Norris can scratch sandpaper.
Yo momma so poor... Burglars break into yo momma's home and leave money.
It is a fact that Chuck Norris cannot cry, this is because his tearducts are too muscular.
Chuck Norris pours the milk first, then he pours the cereal. Then he places the bowl.