boy: spell "me"
girl: M-E
boy: but you forgot the D
girl: there's no D in me
boy: not yet ;)
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Teacher: "Who knows 5+5=?"
Little Johnny: "11"
Teacher: "Take out your hand from trousers pocket and count with your fingers."
Vote:
Josey wasn't the best pupil at Sunday school.
She often fell asleep and one day while she was sleeping, the teacher asked her a question.
"Who is the creator of the universe?"
Joe was sitting next to Josey and decided to poke her with a pin to wake her up.
Josey jumped and yelled, "God almighty!"
The teacher congratulated her.
A little later the teacher asked her another question, "Tell me who is our lord and savior?"
Joe poked Josey again and she yelled out, "Jesus Christ!"
The teacher congratulated her again.
Later on the teacher asked, "What did Eve say to Adam after their 26th child?"
Joe poked Josey again and she shouted, "If you stick that thing in me again, I'll snap it in half and stick it up your ass!"
Vote:
Q: Why do vegetarians give good head?
A: Beause they're used to eating nuts.
Joe is on his last day at work as a mailman.
He receives many thank-you cards and monetary gifts along his route.
When he gets to the very last house, he is greeted by a gorgeous housewife, who invites him in for lunch.
Joe happily accepts.
After lunch, the woman invites him up to the bedroom for some "desert."
Joe happily accepts again.
When they are done, the woman gives him a dollar.
Joe asks what the dollar is all about.
The woman replies: "It was my husband's suggestion. When I told him that it was your last day at work, he told me 'F**k him, give him a dollar. The lunch was my idea."
What is the geographical definition of s*x?
Ans: It is an action done by the polland in the holland between the thailand with the little help of greece.
Bully: Your dick is probably like a tic tac.
Geek: No wonder your mom's mouth is so fresh.
Class: Oooooohhhh!
What has 100 teeth and eats weiners?
A zipper!
Girls are like biscuits - they are tough until they get wet.