Joke #7930

How many men does it take to screw a light bulb? A. One - men will screw anything. B. One - men will screw up anything. C. Five - one to actually do the screwing, four to listen to him brag about it.
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has 61.96 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: light bulb, men

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Two factory workers are talking. The woman says, "I can make the boss give me the day off." The man replies, "And how would you do that?" The woman says, "Just wait and see." She then hangs upside-down from the ceiling. The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?" The woman replies, "I'm a light bulb." The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off." The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?" The man says, "I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark."
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has 82.01 % from 312 votes. More jokes about: light bulb, men, work
Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One. Men will screw anything.
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has 76.27 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: light bulb, men
How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One...men will screw anything.
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has 68.90 % from 163 votes. More jokes about: light bulb, men
Q:How many divorced men does it take to screw in a light bulb? A:None, the sockets go with the house.
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has 56.05 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: divorce, light bulb, men
How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? ONE......He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.
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has 24.18 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: light bulb, men
Once there were three men, Dave, John, and Sam, who were involved in a tragic car accident in which all three died. As they stood at the gates of heaven St. Peter came up to them and said, "You will all be given a method of transportation for your eternal use around heaven. You will be judged on your past deeds, and will have your transport chosen accordingly." St. Peter looked at Dave and said, "You, Dave, were a bad man. You cheated on your wife four times! For this, you will drive around Heaven in an old beat up Dodge." Next St. Peter looked at John and said, "You, were not so evil, but you still cheated on your wife two times. For this, you will forever travel around heaven in a Toyota stationwagon." St. Peter finally looked at Sam, and said, "You, Sam, have set a fine example. You did not have sex until after marriage, and you never cheated on your wife! For this, you will forever travel through heaven in a Ferrari." A short time later, Jon and Dave pulled up in their cars next to Sam’s Ferrari and there he is, sitting on the hood, head in hands, crying. "What’s wrong, Sam?" they asked. "You got the Ferrari! You are set forever! Why so down?" Sam looked up, ever so slowly opened his mouth and cried, "I just saw my wife go by on a skate board."
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has 78.06 % from 178 votes. More jokes about: car, death, heaven, marriage, men
Q: Why was the blonde girl's belly button bruised? A: Because blonde men are dumb too.
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has 73.22 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: blonde, men, sex, stupid, women
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They just beat the room for being black.
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has 71.25 % from 800 votes. More jokes about: black people, cop, light bulb, racist
How many bankers does it take to change a light bulb? Four. One to hold the bulb, and three to try and remember the combination.
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has 63.75 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: light bulb, memory, money, work
Q: Why did the blonde have blisters on her lips? A: From trying to blow out light bulbs.
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has 55.39 % from 74 votes. More jokes about: blonde, light bulb, stupid