Chuck Norris can hear your text messages.
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Death once got sentenced to Chuck Norris.
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Latin insulted Chuck Norris.
It is now a dead language.
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Some people can ride their bikes with no handle bars.
But chuck norris can ride his handlebars with no bike.
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Chuck Norris once went to court for a crime, the judge pleaded guilty.
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You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex?
Because he never fucks up.
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Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."
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When Jacques Cousteau reached the bottom of the sea he found Chuck Norris snorkeling.
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Chuck Norris cuts paper by sticking his fingers out in a V and moving them up and down.
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Chuck Norris can light ants on fire with a magnifying glass.
At Night.
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Chuck Norris doesn't compete, he wins.
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