Chuck Norris doesn't beat around the bush, he beats up the bush.
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Aliens DO indeed exist.
They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.
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The earth is rotating because Chuck Norris is breathing.
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Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel.
Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
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Chuck norris once ate a rubix cube and pooped it out solved.
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Ed and Lorraine Warren have the doll Anabelle locked in a glass case in their basement, a priest comes there every week to whisper Chuck Norris's name in its ear.
The doll locked itself in the case upon first hearing the name.
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Chuck Norris stem cells can reproduce missing limbs.
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Chuck Norris went to the sun and spent two nights.
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Chuck Norris was once tested for steroids.
The results came back positive.
When confronted with this information, Chuck Norris chuckled and said, "Of course, what do you think they make steroids from?"
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Chuck Norris once played with Legos.
The Ancient Egyptians still thank him for it.
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Chuck Norris does not understand any phrase that begins with "if at first you don't succeed."
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