Q: What happens when you give Viagra to lawyers? A: They grow taller!
Yo' Mama is so stupid, when they said, "Order in the court," she asked for fries and a shake.
The devil visited a lawyer’s office and made him an offer. “I can arrange some things for you, ” the devil said. “I’ll increase your income five-fold. Your partners will love you; your clients will respect you; you’ll have four months of vacation each year and live to be a hundred. All I require in return is that your wife’s soul, your children’s souls, and their children’s souls rot in hell for eternity.” The lawyer thought for a moment. “What’s the catch?” he asked.
A man woke up in a hospital bed and called for his doctor. He asked, “Give it to me straight. How long have I got?” The physician replied that he doubted that the man would survive the night. The man then said, “Call for my lawyer.” When the lawyer arrived, the man asked for his physician to stand on one side of the bed, while the lawyer stood on the other. The man then laid back and closed his eyes. When he remained silent for several minutes, the physician asked what he had in mind. The man replied “Jesus died with a thief on either side. I just thought I’d check out the same way.”
Q: What happens when a lawyer takes Viagra? A: He gets taller.
What’s a foot long, transparent and lies in the gutter. A lawyer once the crap’s been kicked out of him.
A teenage boy overdosed on ten bottles of Viagra. Not only is he lucky to be alive, he’s lucky not to have taken his eye out.
My wife's cooking is so bad we usually pray after our food.
What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline? You take off your shoes to jump on a trampoline.
Yo mama so old she knew Burger King when he was still a prince.
Q: Have you tried Starbucks new hot beverage, Viagraccino? A: One cup and you're up all night.