Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA.
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Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
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Chuck Norris can divide prime numbers into whole numbers.
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Chuck Norris can finish Mario Bros without using the jump button.
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If Chuck Norris hosted TV series "Survivor" No one would Survive!
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When Chuck Norris makes a burrito, its main ingredient is real toes.
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Santa Claus asks Chuck Norris for presents.
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The burning bush that Moses spoke of was actually Chuck Norris's beard!
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Chuck Norris can lie honestly.
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Q: What do a bungee jump cord and a hooker have in common?
A: If the rubber breaks you're screwed.
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Chuck Norris can mute silence.
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