Chuck gives the sun the chills.
Chuck Norris doesn't need his seatbelt becouse no one is stupid enough to hit him.
Chuck Norris doesn't blink...reality pauses.
When Chuck Norris puts toast in the toaster it comes out bread.
They say that "You can't cheat Death", but Chuck Norris can beat it fairly.
Chuck Norris knows who's buried in Grant's Tomb.
Chuck Norris found Nemo with his eyes closed.
Chuck Norris has no need to walk. The universe simply moves around him.
When Chuck Norris falls out of a boat , he dosn't hit water... That's because Chuck Norris would never fall out of a boat it the first place.
Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder. Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life."
Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.