Joke #8598

Yo' Mama is so stupid, it took her an hour to cook instant rice.
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has 36.90 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: food, insulting, stupid, time, Yo mama

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Two friends run into each other while walking their dogs. One suggests lunch. The other says, "They won't let us in a restaurant with pets." Undeterred, the first guy and his German shepherd head into the restaurant. The maître d' stops them, saying, "Sir, you can't bring your dog in here." "But I'm blind," the man replies, "and this is my guide dog." The maître d', apologizing profusely, shows both man and dog to a table. His friend waits five minutes, then tries the same routine. "You have a Chihuahua for a guide dog?" the skeptical maître d' says. "A Chihuahua?" the man says. "Is that what they gave me?"
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During a lesson little Johnny yawns extremely wide. Teacher tries to make a joke: "Johnny, don't swallow me." He replies: "Don't worry, teacher, I don't eat pork."
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has 83.18 % from 354 votes. More jokes about: food, insulting, little Johnny, teacher, vulgar
Yo momma so ugly she threw a boomerang and it refused to come back.
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has 82.23 % from 8259 votes. More jokes about: insulting, ugly, Yo mama
One day a traveling salesman was driving down a back country road at about 30 mph when he noticed that there was a three-legged chicken running alongside his car. He stepped on the gas but at 50 miles per hour. The chicken was still keeping up. After about a mile of running the chicken ran up a farm lane and into a barn behind an old farm house. The salesman had some time to kill so he turned around and drove up the farm lane. He knocked at the door and when the farmer answered he told him what he had just seen. The farmer said that he was a geneticist and had developed this breed of chicken because he, his wife and his son each like a drumstick when they have chicken and this way they only have to kill one chicken. "That"s the most fantastic thing I've ever heard," said the salesman. "How do they taste?" "I don't know," said the farmer. "We've never caught one."
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has 82.20 % from 110 votes. More jokes about: animal, car, food, time, wife
Yo Mamas so stupid she was yelling into the mailbox. We ask her whats she doing and she said, she was sending a voice-mail.
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has 82.09 % from 8249 votes. More jokes about: insulting, Yo mama
Yo momma so stupid, when I told her that she lost her mind, she went looking for it.
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has 82.00 % from 5771 votes. More jokes about: insulting, stupid, Yo mama
Yo Momma So Fat The Only Letters She Knows In The Alphabet Are K.F.C!
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has 81.90 % from 7229 votes. More jokes about: fat, food, insulting, Yo mama
Yo mamma so ugly even Bob the Builder said, "We cant fix it."
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has 81.86 % from 5827 votes. More jokes about: insulting, Yo mama
Three men were walking along in the forest when they were captured by a group of cannibals. The king of the cannibals gives the three men a challenge "If you complete this challenge, you will go free, if not we will eat you." The three men, not wanting to die, agree to hear the challenge. "You most go in to the forest and pick out 10 of any fruit you find, bring those fruits back here" the king says. The three men head out in search of their fruit. The first man comes back with 10 apples in his hands, happy as can be. The king then says "You must shove those 10 apples up your butt without making a sound." The man reluctantly agrees to try. He gets the first one up without a sound, but screams in agony on the second and is killed and eaten. The second man comes back with 10 grapes in his hand. Again the king states the challenge. The 10 fruit up the ass, without any sound. This is going to be easy he thinks. He gets through the first 9 without a single sound. Just as he is about to shove the 10th grape up he bursts out in laughter. He is killed immediately. The second guy still laughing meets the first guy up in heaven. The first guy says, "What's so funny? You could have still been alive!" He replies "I saw our buddy coming back with 10 pineapples and a huge smile."
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has 81.85 % from 260 votes. More jokes about: death, food, men, time
Yo' Mama's cooking is so bad, the homeless give it back.
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has 81.52 % from 7615 votes. More jokes about: food, insulting, Yo mama