Chuck Norris doesn't smoke cigars.
He smokes smoke grenades.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use a fire extinguisher to put out fires... he just tells the fire to stop burning.
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Before his rise to fame, Jaws was Chuck Norris's goldfish.
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Depending on the circumstances, Chuck Norris will decide whether or not his farts will stink.
If he chooses to have them stink, he will then also determine the appropriate percentage level of rankness delivered based on the demographics of the attending audience.
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Chuck Norris and Hitler were sitting in a cafe.
Chuck said, "I don't like the juice."
Hitler heard him wrong.
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Chuck Norris can light ants on fire with a magnifying glass.
At Night.
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Chuck Norris can't get a riddle wrong.
The riddle can only have the wrong answer.
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Chuck Norris grew a beard at the age of eighteen.
Twice.
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Chuck Norris has never received an electricity bill, he powers everything with his rage
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Reading Chuck Norris Facts is the same as learning history.
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Chuck Norris's 1st Grade teacher asked him how many stars there were on the American Flag.
Chuck Norris replied "Yes." and was correct.
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