Chuck Norris digs up gold - from silver linings.
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Chuck Norris once caught AIDS... but then he let it go.
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The Grinch stole Christmas until Chuck Norris ordered him to return it.
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Chuck Norris got swept over Niagara Falls...
He liked it so much, he swam back up and did it again.
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Most leading hand sanitizers say that they can kil 99.99% of all germs.
Chuck Norris can kill 100% of WHATEVER HE WANTS.
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Earth is not spinning around the sun.
The sun is just desperately trying to keep a distance to Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris visits Africa, the animals are required to stay in their cars.
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Chuck Norris can't get a riddle wrong.
The riddle can only have the wrong answer.
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Chuck Norris can make a dog bark the alphabet, in spanish, backwards.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need oxygen tanks when scuba diving.
He simply sucks all the life out of the ocean to breath.
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Chuck Norris injected his blood into a monkey, a fish, and a lizard.
They are now known as King Kong, Jaws, and Godzilla.
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