Chuck Norris knows what pi tastes like.
Chuck Norris is the ghost in paranormal activity.
Chuck Norris never actually moves. He merely rotates the earth with his feet.
Chuck Norris can smell sound and hear touch.
When Chuck Norris visits Egypt, the sand didn't burn his feet, his feet burnt the sand, hence the discovery of glass.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
If Chuck Norris ever got caught for speeding, he'd let the cops off with a warning.
Superman's weakness isn't kryptonite, it's obvious who it is...
Chuck Norris lives in a all white house with all white furniture and all white carpet. Why? Dirt knows better.
In a fight between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee, Chuck Norris would win. No questions.
Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.