Arnold Schwarzenegger cannot tell Chuck Norris to "get down!"
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Chuck Norris doesn't have an Ipod, he has an Ifist.
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Chuck Norris was about to die... until the Grim Reaper phoned in sick.
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Chuck Norris' yawn put people in comas.
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Chuck Norris once had a bet with the Hulk, the loser had to paint himself green.
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Chuck Norris puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us.
The only difference is, then he kills people.
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Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin.
The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
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Chuck Norris can split the atom.
With his bare hands.
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Chuck Norris can say never.
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When Chuck Norris plays Nazi Zombies it's the Zombies who build barriers.
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Total Recall was based off of an average day in the life of Chuck Norris.
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