Chuck Norris created the Grand Canyon because he coughed "Just Once".
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Chuck Norris can strike the same lightning twice.
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Chuck Norris fell off a building, he got sued for breaking the sidewalk with his fists.
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Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer.
Too bad he has never cried.
Ever.
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Chuck Norris puts phone companies on hold.
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Last year Chuck Norris won the prize for best float at the Carnival in Rio simply by walking in the parade wearing his cowboy hat.
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Chuck Norris knows the last number of infinity.
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Chuck Norris made the universe... out of his snot and left kidney.
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Chuck Norris sleeps with every woman on the planet once a month... and they bleed for a week.
When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive.
The zombies do.
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Chuck Norris can make a rock grow.
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