Q: What is height of Suicide?
A: A dwarf jumping from the footpath on the road.
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Why did Beyonce sing 'to the left', 'to the left'?
Because black people have no rights...
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How do you make a dead baby float?
Take your foot off of it’s head.
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Q. What do Ethiopians and Yoko Ono have in common?
A. They both live off dead Beatles.
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What is the difference between turkey and mother-in-law?
There is no difference: both are the best when they are cold on the table.
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How do you know Charles Sweeney was dyslexic?
He wanted to order the flaming saganagi, but he accidentally ordered a flaming Nagasaki.
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"Did you hear about the undertaker who buried someone in the wrong place?"
"He was sacked for making a grave mistake."
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Why did Hitler go to the eye doctor?
Because he can Nazi.
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Me: "Here comes the airplane!"
Baby: Opens mouth.
Me: "OH NO! It's the Taliban!" Hits baby in the forehead with the spoon. "KA-BOOM"
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Hitler: I asked for a glass of juice, not gas the Jews!
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Whats the difference between a jew camp and a summer camp?
The kids come back.
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