Chuck Norris didn't cross the road... he was already on the other side...
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Right angles used to be called wrong angles until Chuck said, "I don't see anything wrong with them."
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Keep your friends close, and your enemies close to Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.
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Chuck Norris created the Grand Canyon because he coughed "Just Once".
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Chuck Norris can straighten a circle.
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Chuck Norris doesn't shave, his beard grows to the perfect length and stops.
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Chuck Norris can hit you so hard your blood will bleed.
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When Chuck Norris was 12 years old, he mauled a pit bull.
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When Chuck Norris falls over, the ground needs a band-aid
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When Chuck Norris gets pulled over he read the officers his rights.
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