Q: Know how to solve the Serbian/Bosnian problem in less than 48 hours? A: Put Janet Reno in charge.
In the winter of 1926, Thelma Goldstein from Chicago treated herself to her first real vacation in Florida. Being unfamiliar with the area, she wandered into a restricted hotel in North Miami. "Excuse me," she said to the manager. "My name is Mrs. Goldstein, and I’d like a small room for two weeks." "I’m awfully sorry," he replied, "but all of our rooms are occupied." Just as he said that, a man came down and checked out. "What luck," said Mrs. Goldstein. "Now there’s a room. "Not so fast, Madam. I’m sorry, but this hotel is restricted. No Jews allowed." "Jewish? Who’s Jewish? I happen to be Catholic." "I find that hard to believe. Let me ask you, who was the Son of God?" "Jesus, Son of Mary." "Where was he born?" "In a stable." "And why was he born in a stable?" "Because a schmuck like you wouldn’t let a Jew rent a room in his hotel!"
The teacher asked little Johnny, “What’s two and two?”. He counted 1-2-3-4 on his fingers and said, “Four, teacher?”. She said, ” Yes, that’s right, but you counted on your fingers. Put your hands behind behind your back and tell me what’s three and three”. He put his hands behind his back, fumbled around, and answered, “Six, teacher?”. She said, “Yes, that’s right, but you’re still counting on your fingers. Put your hands in your pockets and tell me what’s five and five”. He put his hands in his pockets, fumbled around, and replied, “Eleven, teacher?”.
Q. How do you know if a Asian robbed your house? A. Your HW is done , computer is upgraded, 2 hrs later lil f***er still tryin back off the driveway.
What does a nigger do after sex? 25 years to life.
Q: What's the difference between killing time and killing niggers? A: You can only kill so much time.
Q: How long does it take a black lady to shit? A: About 9 months.
The manager of the liquor store gets a phone call at 8 pm. "At what time do you open tomorrow?" asked the caller. "At nine," he answered. The phone rings at midnight "What time do you open ... in the morning?" "At nine". The phone rings at 4 in the morning "Whatt tim do ya openn in the mornin?" "I told you before at nine". "Imm just inn aa hury cause i got locked in tha stor las nite."
How to tell who is Jewish in your class, drop a penny and see who gets their first.
I thought I was real racist because I was liking those black men so black that if you looked at a picture of them, it looks like a negative.
Why do men need instant replay on TV sports? Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.