Chuck Norris can make his own reflection vomit with fear.
Chuck Norris texts with punctuation.
Chuck Norris never has a deja vu. No scene would be that stupid to appear in front of the man twice.
Chuck Norris: The Game starts directly with the ending video.
Chuck Norris eats black holes for breakfast. They taste like chicken.
Chuck Norris can headbutt himself in the face.
When Chuck Norris was kidnapped by aliens he did experiments on them.
Bears only poop in the woods when Chuck Norris says its ok..
Chuck Norris doesn’t wash his clothes, he disembowels them.
Chuck Norris shaves with a hunting knife. "Shaving" consists of cutting a new mouth-hole every morning. That's how tough his beard is.
Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books. The words assemble themselves out of fear.