The original plan for Hiroshima and Nagasaki was to send in Chuck Norris.
We decided to go the humane route.
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Chuck Norris is the only person to know pi, because when he puts it into the calculator, the calculator doesn't dare give him only part of it.
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Kanye West interupted Chuck Norris and became Kanye East.
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Chuck Norris put humpty dumpty back together again, only to roundhouse kick him in the face.
Later Chuck dined on scrambled eggs with all the king's horses and all the king's men.
The king himself could not attend for unspecified reasons.
Coincidentally, the autopsoy revealed the cause of death to be a roundhouse kick to the face.
There is only one King.
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Chuck Norris always wins at Jenga, the tower couldn't dare to crumble.
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Chuck Norris uses paper to cut scissors.
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It's a proven fact that you will go blind faster staring at a picture of Chuck Norris than you would staring at the sun.
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Chuck Norris can unscramble eggs.
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Usain Bolt only began running when he heard, Chuck Norris was in Jamaica shooting a commercial for Red Bull.
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Chuck Norris has only used the 'Total Gym' twice in his life.
When his eyes are open - and when they are closed.
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The only reason you woke up this morning is because Chuck Norris allowed you too.
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