Q: What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?
A: Stinkerbell!
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Teeth says to tongue: if I just press a little, you'll get cut.
Tongue replies: if i misuse a single word, all 32 of you will come out.
Q: How do you find Ronald McDonald in a nudist colony?
A: Look for sesame seed buns.
What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half mast?
They're hiring.
How long does it take a Mexican to build a, holy shit they're done!
Q:Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm the school bell.
A: Take These tablets and if they don't work give me a ring in the morning.
Women are looking for Mr. Right.
Men are looking for Ms. Right Now.
I hate it when you offer someone a sincere compliment about their mustache, and suddenly she is not your friend anymore...
A old man was sitting in the front row at a town meeting, heckling the mayor as he delivered a long speech.
Finally the mayor could stand it no longer, so he pointed to the heckler and said, "will that gentleman please stand up and tell the audience what he has ever done for the good of the city."
"Well Mr. Mayor," the man said in a firm voice. "I voted against you in the last election."
Me: I just bought Tupacs of Eminems for 50 Cents.
Friend: That's Ludacris. How Kanye West your money like that?