The true reason why the Nazi's lost the war was because they stopped trying after they found out Chuck Norris had a summer home in Russia.
Count Dracula once bit Chuck Norris and immediately turned vegetarian.
The real reason Hitler killed himself is because he found out that Chuck Norris is Jewish.
Chuck Norris and Hitler were sitting in a cafe. Chuck said, "I don't like the juice." Hitler heard him wrong.
Q: What was Hitler's favorite toy as a kid? A: An Easy-Bake Oven.
Simon doesn't say... Chuck Norris says.
Chuck Norris runs until the Treadmill gets tired.
I find it interesting that if you rearrange the letters in the word "Mother-in-law" you get the words "Woman Hitler".
Chuck Norris won a staring contest with his eyes closed.
When somebody else yawns, Chuck Norris does not.
One of Hitler's assistants says to him one day, "Sir, we're mining too many useless ores." Hitler replies, "Well, mine less." A grammar nazi then bursts through the door and shouts, "Mine FEWER!" Hitler looks up and asks, "Yes?"