Chuck Norris dosn't need a gun, he points an says pow!
If, by some incredible space-time parodox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period.
One man said he got his butt whooped by Chuck Norris twice but he lied, because everyone knows you couldn't survive it once.
Chuck Norris has no need for a TV remote. He stares at his television, until it changes the channel.
Chuck Norris can stick his hand inside a rabbit's mouth and pull out a HAT!
Yo mamma so ugly she scares Chuck Norris!
Chuck Norris runs Windows Vista, and it has never crashed.
When Chuck Norris breaks the speed limit, no one can put it back together again.
Most leading hand sanitizers say that they can kil 99.99% of all germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100% of WHATEVER HE WANTS.
Host migration is Chuck Norris pausing multiplayer.
Chuck Norris doesn't need photos, he takes mental pictures.