One does not simply survive Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can paint himself into a corner and still get the job done.
The phrase 'dead ringer' refers to someone who sits behind Chuck Norris in a movie theater and forgets to turn their cell phone off.
If it looks like chicken tastes like chicken and smells like chicken and Chuck Norris says it's beef then it's beef.
If Chuck Norris replaced Roy Scheider, the movie would have been known as Broken Jaws, and would have only lasted 12 minutes.
Chuck Norris doesn't moon walk, the moon Chuck-Norris Walks.
The Animal Crackers that Chuck Norris eats are made from real animals.
What occurs twice in The Beginning, never in The End, but is at The End of Everything? Chuck Norris.
Devil stays in hell because he knows Chuck is around, here on earth.
During vacation my front door's open and I left a note saying "This house is protected by Chuck Norris 3 days a week you guess which 3." All was good.
Chuck Norris is the meaning of life. Too bad he's also the meaning of death.