Chuck Norris doesn't smile, his mouth smiles for him.
Batman is to Robin as Chuck Norris is to Death.
The war with Japan would have ended sooner, but the allies decided that dropping Chuck Norris on Hiroshima would be a crime against humanity.
Before Chuck Norris can register as a soldier, all wars suddenly end.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
Dante's Inferno is based on a Nature Walk Chuck Norris once took.
Chuck was once on the Olympics and he won all the medals but he was disqualifyed for roundhouse kicking the judges because they misspelled his name.
Chuck Norris can run a full marathon in just 3 miles.
When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
Big Foot discovered Chuck Norris and hid in the forest.
Chuck Norris could play cd-based games on his Nintendo 64.