When somebody is all up in your face, just be glad that that someone is NOT Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once ate a bottle of sleeping pills.
They made him blink.
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Chuch Norris doesn't make threats, he makes promises.
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Chuck Norris kills time in his spare time.
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The earth is rotating because Chuck Norris is breathing.
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Someone tried to stab Chuck Norris in the stomach, and the knife bent on his rock-hard abs.
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There is no use crying over split milk, unless it's Chuck Norris' milk.
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Lawsuit commercials for personal injury are quite common with things like accidents and medication; however they never mention Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can pour a pancake so thin that it only has one side.
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Chuck Norris can eat food while his mouth is closed.
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911 calls Chuck Norris for emergency.
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