Joke #9918

What does a cow like to do by a campfire? Roast Moosmallows.

What kind of money do polar bears use? Ice lolly.

What do you call an easy-going rabbit? Hoppy-go-lucky.

A lonely frog telephoned the Psychic Hotline and asked what his future holds. His Personal Psychic Advisor tells him: "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you." The frog is thrilled, "This is great! "Will I meet her at a party?" he croaks. "No," says the psychic, "in biology class."

Q: Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? A: Of course, a house doesn't jump at all.

Sharks have a week dedicated to Chuck Norris.

What do you get if you cross a cat with a gorilla? An animal that puts you out at night.

An old lady was considering buying a squirrel fur coat. "But will it be all right in the rain?" she asked anxiously. "Oh certainly, ma am," said the manager smoothly. "After all, you've never seen a squirrel with an umbrella have you?"

What kind of bees make milk instead of honey? Boobies.

While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, "No honey for you for one month!" Later that afternoon, Johnny's dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. "That's it! No butter for you for one month!" says his dad. Later that evening as Johnny's mother cooks dinner, a cockroach run across the kitchen floor. She jumps and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny and her husband watching her. Little Johnny looks at his father and says, "Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?"

What do you do when two snails have a fight? Leave them to slug it out.