Chuck Norris's wish isn't your command, Chuck Norris's command is your wish...
Chuck Norris has never won a single fight. Winning would imply some sort of competition or chance that he could loose.
Chuck Norris doesn't moon walk, the moon Chuck-Norris Walks.
Chuck Norris can make a snowman with sand.
Chuck Norris can make a stop sign say go.
Chuck Norris can ski up a mountain.
Motley Crue released a new song called "Roundhouse Kickstart My Heart" dedicated to Chuck Norris. It will be number one in the top 40 forever.
When Chuck Norris was born, he cut his own umbilical cord. He then used it to strangle the doctor who slapped him on the but.
Chuck Norris can copy and paste on a typewriter.
Chuck Norris can hit a grand slam with no one on base.
Chuck Norris made Ellen Degeneres straight.