The sandman puts other people to sleep but Chuck Norris put the sandman to sleep.
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They say, "You can't fight city hall", but Chuck Norris can.
It's not much of a fight....
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Chuck Norris is the only one who doesn't have to tell PayPal to switch the funding source to his credit card.
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When Chuck Norris watches a horror movie, Chuck Norris dosen't scream, the movie does.
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The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there.
In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
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Guns need a licence to bear Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris walked into a bar.
"OUCH!" said the bar.
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Chuck Norris was the reason the Titanic sank.
The iceberg was just a cover-up.
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A Chuck Norris round house kick is considered the first "super-collider".
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The Yeti can't be found because it Chuck Norris made sure no one ever finds it.
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When Chuck Norris says "Jump", you don't say, "How high?" - you say, "When do I come down?"
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